11.16.2009

Visit: Smaller Baptist Church

It sure is hard to visit other churches while continuing to participate fully in the one you attend regularly. Or maybe we just took October off. Either way, we realized that if we were going to try any other places, November 15th would be the day.

Since it was rather balmy for mid-November, we walked to Belmont Baptist. Decades ago, this would have been our default church, I imagine: people probably just went to the closest church of their chosen denomination. Nowadays, with liberal Baptists and ecumenical churches and conservatives and non-denominationals, it's no wonder so many folks stay home on Sunday mornings: it's too confusing.

I think Belmont is probably representative of a typical small, relatively conservative Baptist church: mostly old, mostly white, mostly empty. In a way, this disappointed me, since Belmont (the neighborhood) has gone through so many changes and has visions of being hip, bohemian, and progressive, yet Belmont (the church) seems not to have changed with the neighborhood.

I remember visiting Belmont as a UVA student nine years ago and thinking that it was OK but pretty old. Most established/ traditional churches are on the gray side, but Belmont strikes me as a little more skewed toward the upper end of the age spectrum. In fact, Amanda spotted her great-great-aunt a few rows ahead of us, someone she had not seen since her great-grandmother's funeral 15 years ago, yet who, somehow, looked exactly the same. This, along with the fact that Amanda's great-great-aunt used to live in Belmont and still rents out the old family home, led me to my Belmont Baptist Hypothesis: When the neighborhood was a thriving community of working-class folks decades ago, maybe Belmont Baptist was a thriving representation of those who lived here. Now that the neighborhood has changed and the church hasn't, it consists largely of people who have moved away but continue driving in on Sundays. I have no idea if this is true, but it happens in a lot of churches.

Or maybe they still see Belmont as a down-on-its-luck neighborhood, which it certainly has been in the past. Maybe the church members are swooping in to save the neighborhood. They already do some significant ministries for the poor, and they're starting an excellent new one. It's great to see people spending their time doing something good.

Belmont Baptist also gets an A+ on being welcoming. From the moment the door opened and we were greeted with a friendly, "Y'all come on in!", we continued shaking hands well into the beginning of the service. The prelude was informal, with everyone continuing to talk, and after the welcome came the "shake your neighbor's hand" time. Those folks moved all around that sanctuary to shake hands. (UBC tried this a week or two ago, but instructed everyone not to shake hands due to H1N1. Belmont did nothing of the sort, since shaking hands is holy in smaller churches).

One of the members was what I'd call the liturgist: said the welcome, did some prayers, etc. He also probably shook the most hands of anyone there, although he didn't shake ours. He's a resident-turned-Republican-politician who just unseated the Chair of the County Board of Supervisors in a close race. (I believe his platform was essentially "No.") Despite the outgoing Chair's odd stances on some issues and his highly talkative and sometimes argumentative personality, he is a great advocate for transit and transportation, runs a planning firm, and drives an electric truck. I will be sorry to see him removed. So having his replacement lead my prayers really challenged me to worship God in spite of it.

How much should politics affect the church decision? Just because one parishioner is a politician doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad church. Politicians have to go to church somewhere. But I began wondering whether it was the votes of the people in this congregation that pushed the election his way, and exactly how much power he had over them, and it was distracting. I also wondered whether there were people there from across the political spectrum or if he was truly representative of all their views.

We got an e-mail from the pastor on Tuesday. On Wednesday and Thursday, we got phone calls from someone at Belmont. (We didn't answer on Wednesday, not recognizing the name, but I answered it on Thursday. He said it was nice to have such a young couple in church, or something of that nature. The thing is, we purposely did not put our phone number on the visitor card. They must have looked us up in the phone book. That takes dedication... and is a little weird.) Friday, we got a handwritten letter from the pastor. All fantastic, but none substitute for having people roughly our age, roughly where we are in life, greet us personally, and there didn't appear to be anybody our age there.

There were some youth, we think, and there were a few kids, and the pastor knew all the kids' names when they came for the children's time. I'm sure it would be a fine place to raise a kid, but I'm not so sure it's the right place to raise my kid(s).

The choir had a bunch of older women and two older men. (I am forming another hypothesis about the advantages for choirs of more liberal churches, where men don't have to feel that singing challenges their machismo.) I think there were four choir members without gray/white/no hair. The music matched the small-church and older-person style, featuring at least one countrified pronunciation of "dee-vine." The invitational hymn featured a full-on spoken invitation beforehand and was as slow as molasses (O Master, Let Me Walk with Thee? More like O Master Hang On, Wait for Me.)

The pastor is younger, seems really nice, and had some decent jokes. His sermon connected with the older crowd by referencing Sanford and Son (and maybe connected with Amanda, since she grew up watching reruns of it). But neither of us managed to pay attention during the whole talk well enough to be able to discuss what we got out of it on the walk home.

So Belmont, although you were mostly inoffensive, we didn't feel God calling us to return too often. Best of luck to you. And don't listen to that politician guy.

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posted by Peter @ 18:23 0 Comments

9.28.2009

Visit: Smaller Liberal Church

We finally made it to visit a second church. Because the weather was nice, we narrowed it down to two churches within walking distance of our house: Sojourners and Belmont Baptist. Both were having out-of-the-ordinary services, with a special speaker at Sojourners and a 60th homecoming celebration at Belmont. We settled on Sojourners to get the full "crazy liberal church" experience. And because it is only a five-minute walk instead of 10 or 15.

Sojourners is a relatively new church and is affiliated with the United Church of Christ, which is a bit of a departure for us faithful Baptists, but in many ways it felt similar to Binkley, the church we attended in Chapel Hill, which was Baptist. It is openly inclusive of all, regardless of culture, "race, age, gender, sexual orientation, mental or physical challenges, or religious background." A banner in the sanctuary says "Social Justice." There are recycling containers. The bulletin lists upcoming community events related to peace, non-violent communication, Islam, Christianity, and other topics.

If we attended this church, probably the biggest adjustment would be that the worship service is at 9:30 instead of the more typical 11. I guess this gives you more time to do justice the rest of the day, or it would, if the service weren't as long as it was last week. We left at about 11:15, and there was still an hour of discussion planned. The special focus was prison ministries, a timely topic given the recent press about the Books Behind Bars program, and there were a lot of visitors there for the size of the congregation.

It's not a tiny church but isn't big by any standards; the sanctuary is modest and was configured in the round with chairs instead of pews. By the time they started (late), though, an empty chair was hard to come by. Attendees were truly diverse in the characteristics specified above. It really makes me wonder why all churches cannot just welcome all people, rather than forcing some to be relegated to a "welcoming" church as if it's some kind of leper colony.

Music was different but interesting. With a piano but no organ, about half of what we sang was accompanied. The service began and ended with a South African praise song that we learned by repeating the leader (no printed words or notes to look at). The closing song was done in a big circle around the outside of the room, holding hands, kum-ba-yah style - "to look into each other's faces and feel the inclusion." The choir, a 10-person group (also diverse, with one woman in traditional Indian garb) sang harmonies nicely, with one somewhat familiar hymn from the hymnal and another on an insert. The offertory music was a little different, because it began only after everyone had already given their gifts by standing up and carrying them to the communion table at the center of the room. (I liked the note in the bulletin explaining the process and adding information about how to sign up for service opportunities, reminding us that money is not the only offering we can give, but I thought it was odd to have everyone move like that in a church with a substantial number of people with physical disabilities.) Amanda pointed out that the choir has long practices, with over two hours on Sundays plus occasional Saturdays. Yikes.

Other than the offertory and closing circle, we weren't forced to move around, but there were three times when individual people stood up to share. The first was right at the beginning, during the welcome, when visitors were asked to stand and introduce themselves. Needless to say, I was horrified at this request. (We did not stand, which might be why nobody really welcomed us after the service. One woman did speak to us beforehand, though.) The second standing time was devoted to any announcements people wanted to make, about whatever topic, and the third was for sharing joys and concerns. Both of these had the potential to get out of hand, added substantial (and unpredictable) time to the service, and reminded me too much of a public meeting where angry people stand up and have their time to speak. They also interrupted the flow and any worshipful mood that had developed.

I guess I'm used to having those sharing times during the Sunday School hour, which isn't an option at Sojourners, because they don't have regular classes. I think they always have fellowship time after the service, and sometimes a special discussion as well, but no small-group Bible study classes. Perhaps the various social justice committees and the evening Bible discussion group (led by a bald man named, no joke, Dawg Strong) serve the purpose of getting smaller groups together. I worry that there are few people our age, as with most churches. There were a handful in the worship service, but I think a lot of them were visiting because of the topic.

There was a children's time, and kids left the service in two bunches to go to children's church: the little ones left right after the children's time, and up through 7th grade left just before the sermon. In most churches I've experienced, middle schoolers sit through the whole service, but I guess maybe the sermon topics are a little too adult for 7th graders?

The day's guest preacher was a young woman who challenged everyone to take the biblical charge to "release the prisoners" to heart by visiting them, praying for them, etc. It was more like a teach-in than a worship service. There was no invitation or pressurized commitment time where a forlorn minister stands up front, hands crossed, trying to sing without the words (a big plus to me).

Sojourners feels a little more like Charlottesville than UBC or First Baptist did. By that, I mean it has the granola types and the aging hippies that populate the farmer's market on Saturday mornings, plus the people with disabilities who probably ride around with the transit provider I work for, plus families who are an active part of this "liberal mecca." It doesn't feel like a university church or like a corporate everybaptistchurch.

It's focused on looking at problems and trying to deal with them. A worthy goal, to be sure, but I wonder if attending Sojourners would end up being too depressing, just as it might be too syrupy sweet for me to attend an all-smiles, praise-and-worship church. There wasn't a lot of humor or laughter at this particular service -- that could be due to the serious topic, but what if it's always a serious topic? Would I end up giving so much time to so many causes that my family would suffer? Or would it make it easier to give time to things that really matter to me?

We found out about another potential drawback to Sojourners through a small blurb in the announcements. It seems that the church is about to undergo a planning process similar to UBC's Advance, and this is happening because "our cherished pastor is retiring." So even if we go back to experience a "normal" service there, which we may do, it might not be very representative of the future.

Overall result: inconclusive.

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posted by Peter @ 17:23 0 Comments

9.09.2009

Home Again? (Part Three)

Last weekend, my parents were in town for a visit. (We always seem to end up going to visit them only a week or two from when they come to visit us.) After a day touring Monticello, we went to UBC on Sunday.

We managed to piddle around in the morning long enough to miss Sunday School, since they wanted to come to our class with us, and we weren't wanting to go. Our class at UBC is called "Twentysomethings," and unlike other classes my parents have visited with us, it's age-based. I'm sure it would have been fine for them to join in, since there are often thirtysomethings in there, plus teachers and their spouses who are my parents' age. But we skipped it.

Another reason we wanted to skip Sunday School was that we had a special mission. Sunday School often involves discussion, sometimes one-sided, that lasts until approximately 20 seconds before the worship service begins upstairs. This would have harmed our chances at a successful special mission, because the special mission required us to find people who have been at UBC for a long time and talk to them.

You see, when we visited my parents a few weeks ago, my mom had been going through some of her dad's old things that she had recently received. She showed us one of them, a large black-and-white photo of some men burning a piece of paper at the front of a church sanctuary. The stained-glass window behind them was unmistakably the one at UBC. Some of the paneling and columns have changed, but this was a picture taken around the time my mom was born, when her family lived in Charlottesville and attended University Baptist Church. (She was six months old when they moved away, so she doesn't exactly remember living here.) Because we had been out of town since our visit to my parents' house, we hadn't shown this photo to anyone.

My mother immediately succeeded in finding someone who recognized the photo. "Oh yes, I was there," he said. "I recognize all those people." The event was a note-burning to celebrate the church paying off a debt of some kind, probably for the building. UBC might already have a bunch of these photos, since photography isn't generally practiced in the Sanctuary except on special occasions, but we gave him the photo to keep with the church's collection.

And then my mom turned to me. "Isn't that neat?" she asked. "You have an old tie with this church."

Home. It's an interesting word. Is the old tie I have with UBC - the fact that my grandparents went there - enough to make it my home? Does that mean it's the right place for me now? Not necessarily. But added to the fact that I spent four years there, that it was the right place for me during that time, and that the church gave generously of itself to support Jubilate, a ministry I benefited from... there is an argument to be made.

And because of all those factors pulling on me, it does kind of feel like cheating to be visiting other churches. And I feel paranoid. In last week's issue of The Word, UBC's weekly newsletter, the pastor's note quotes John Chandler's book Courageous Church Leadership:
I once asked a church architect about why there were so many church arguments about the selection of the color and style of the carpet. He replied that, while very few people understood technical issues related to roof trusses, nearly every person in the church got up in the morning, stood in front of the mirror, and decided that they knew what looked good. Everyone is an expert in what looks good! By the same token, people who have extensive experience 'attending' church sometimes automatically assume that they have great experience 'leading' church. While flying as a passenger in a jet plane doesn't necessarily mean that you know how to pilot one, that does not stop many from offering criticism to those in the cockpit.
As I said, I am paranoid. Although the pastor then tied this to being appreciative that people serving on the Advance Task Force were church leaders and not just attenders, it seemed like it could be directed at me for posting my thoughts here. I know it's not. Exchange of ideas is valued at UBC. Besides, I am not trying to criticize the leadership of any church. I am simply offering the view from the pew, which necessarily involves observations and descriptions of what seems to work and what doesn't.

Speaking of the Advance, I am looking forward to this Sunday, when we will hear UBC's Advance Task Force Report. (The church was going to hold a planning retreat, then somebody pointed out that they didn't want to be retreating from anything, so they changed the name to the Advance. Really. They stuck with it.) We were unable to attend the Advance, since it was on our anniversary weekend, but I am hopeful that the report and ensuing discussion will be encouraging regarding UBC's future. Part of me hopes that it will somehow make it clear to us that UBC is the right place for us and that we don't need to be searching for something else. I know the presentation will not cement anything like that, but I am still interested to hear what was discussed and any recommendations the task force came up with.

Cliffhanger!

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posted by Peter @ 17:22 1 Comments

8.24.2009

Home Again? (Part One)

Because we are adventure-seekers, Amanda and I traveled north last weekend to experience the Prince William County Fair. We stayed with my parents. But I am not writing about the gigantic turkey leg my dad bought that I had to gnaw on because it was too tough for his mouth, or the $4 my mom won for getting second prize in the "homemade jackets" category, or the fact that we did not ride any rides because Amanda is pregnant and it looked stormy, or the animal/magic/comedy show for kids that we watched. No, I am not writing about those things.

I am writing about when, the morning after the fair, we worshiped at Manassas Baptist Church, my "home church," where I attended until going off to college nine years ago this week. Go ahead, click the link. Right there is a picture of what makes MBC unique, and its curse: the middle school and grounds the church bought in 2002 next door to the main church building. It is now known as "The Rock." I may be biased because I wasn't in favor of that purchase to begin with, but The Rock is a big boulder catapulting downhill, pulling the church with it. And because the church used a balloon loan for the multi-million-dollar acquisition (remember 2002?), and the loan is about to "pop," MBC is now in, as my 11th-grade humanities teacher once said, deep kim-chi. The pastor, the same pastor who led the church into this mess, is continuing to try to rally people around "God's plan" -- although I remain unconvinced that God requires big buildings to change hearts.

When I say "the pastor," I mean Dr. Bill, the Senior Pastor, not the Lead Pastor or the Pastor for Discipleship/Evangelism or the Contemporary Worship Leader/Coordinator. At least there's no "assimilation" pastor as there was at First Baptist in Charlottesville. Manassas Baptist has always been a fairly big church, but growing up, it seemed more like a naturally big church, not one bloated by pride and property and wanting to be a megachurch.

All of this is background for my thoughts on Sunday's service at MBC. First piece of excitement: They have a new bulletin format. It is a full-color 11x17 sheet tri-folded, with a nice logo on the front and photos of actual churchgoers. (The only two I recognize are the senior citizens, though.) My dad told me that they are trying to copy McLean Bible Church. It seems MBC is always looking to copy one megachurch or another. Underlying that is a genuine desire to do God's will, though.

In some ways, the 11:00 service at MBC is a comforting reminder of my childhood. Manassas does visitor cards the same way it always has, with two ushers coming to the front and turning around, the person at the pulpit instructing visitors to raise their hands, and the ushers walking towards the back handing out visitor cards. I never thought much about this approach, but now I dislike it. The ushers always start walking a little too early, so if there are any visitors in the first five or ten pews, the ushers walk past them before the visitors know to raise their hands. Plus, if I were a visitor, I might not always feel like raising my hand. I've experienced the bulletin tear-off, the sign-a-register-on-each-pew, the small-church call-out, and the card in the pew rack. I think the card in the pew rack is my favorite: you don't have to scream that you're a visitor, and you have a chance to ask questions.

Over the years, MBC has transitioned from Baptist to what I call Claptist. Maybe it's the contemporary service, or maybe the congregation is just moved to praise God with their hands, but they generally clap after solos. I was taught that clapping in church is generally not appropriate unless you're really sure who the clapping is for: if it's for God's Glory or to say thanks for the gifts of the performers, that's OK, but if it's for someone who just performed, that's kind of like worshiping them instead of God. Clapping is very unusual at UBC, but if a precious darling so much as squeaks out an "Amen," the congregation at MBC will clap. Guaranteed. And I'm pretty sure it's usually for the performance, not for the Glory of God. (It is also interesting that clapping is only after music and rarely after the sermon. Isn't speaking a gift, too?)

The sermon was actually pretty good. My mom said it was Dr. Bill's best in a while, and Amanda said that although it was about 30 minutes long, it kept her attention. (That could have been because we were in the second row, though.) Dr. Bill asks a lot of questions and wants people to raise their hands. As with the clapping, the hand-raising bugs me. It turns some people off to church and makes others uncomfortable -- it's not necessarily bad for a sermon to make people uncomfortable, but it is bad when they're uncomfortable because they're being asked to answer yes or no to a silly question without time to devote conscious thought to it.

Dr. Bill mentioned a celebrity's support for Darfur, which I thought showed a nice awareness of issues outside typical evangelistic confines, although he pronounced Darfur a way I have never heard it pronounced before. I think it rhymed with "Babar." Another highlight of the sermon was that I received an unexpected shout-out from Dr. Bill as he was reminiscing about the large whale costume that my mother made for a musical about Jonah: "You were in it!" Well, almost; I wasn't in the whale suit (that was the husband of the Director of Music), but I was in the musical.

The reason he was talking about Jonah was the God's Plan Argument. Which is: God had a plan for Jonah. Jonah said "meh" to God's plan. God caused Jonah to have an unpleasant experience that led him to follow God's plan after all. Do you want to resist God's plan? Of course you do not, because you will end up inside a whale, and that would be unpleasant in this day and age of harpoons and whatnot. So you should follow God's plan for your life. And you should follow God's plan for Manassas Baptist Church.

I am with Dr. Bill to this point. Where I am not with him is when he draws the conclusion that God's plan for Manassas Baptist Church equals Dr. Bill's plan for Manassas Baptist Church, the implication being that church members should step up and keep the church from going into foreclosure or having to sell off the middle school property. Or else you're gonna feel guilty, or whale-eaten, or worse. As I said before, I am not convinced that God requires a middle school for Manassas Baptist Church to do its work. He certainly might, and the building has certainly spurred new ministries at and brought new notoriety to MBC, but might not an investment of $9 million in the existing property and new programs have enabled similar transformations?

Amanda noticed - although I did not - something else Dr. Bill said. It was when he was talking about Madonna (the pop icon, not the virgin Mary) and her transition to spirituality. He noted that Christian churches probably never told Madonna that they loved her or that God loved her. But God did, and does, love her. And then Dr. Bill pointed to the congregation and said, "And I love you. Because I have the heart of God!", which sounds like a slightly presumptuous claim that he is, in fact, more spiritual than the rest of us by having God's heart. I think he probably meant it as, "The person who spreads God's love in this way is acting in line with God's heart."

I think the physical expansion of MBC has created two churches where there was one: traditional vs. contemporary, organ vs. drums, hymnals vs. PowerPoint. Apparently they have tried a "blended" service, but when the traditionalists requested a slightly lower volume level so that their ears didn't get blown off their skulls, the boppers said, "No way, we like to feel the beat in our kidneys." Did I mention that when we arrived at church, Dr. Bill was finishing up the boppin' service, dressed in a casual polo shirt? And by the time the traditional service started, 10 minutes later, he was in a full suit. It's like he's Superman or something, changing in a phone booth between services to adopt a new identity. And that identity is required because he is serving two congregations. What if the two congregations' differences go deeper than clothing and worship style?

The reason we were sitting up front was because my mom was interpreting the service for a deaf woman. I always feel bad for my mom when Dr. Bill goes into strange stories, sarcasm, or recites the Bob Mumford quote, “if we fix the fix that God has fixed to fix us, He will simply have to fix another fix to fix us.” (My mother told us that because he says that once or twice a year, she has memorized how to sign it.) The ministry for the deaf is one of the really good things about MBC.

The service raised what I think is a fundamental question about how churches prioritize what they do: telling the lost vs. serving the downtrodden. Evangelism vs. social justice. Looking to save Madonna's soul vs. picking her up when she has fallen. Both are important. But given a finite amount of time, there is a real conflict in trying to do both. Churches like First Baptist and Manassas Baptist are very focused on evangelism, on telling the Good News, on winning souls, and this is often to the detriment of their missions and social justice commitments. Other churches are militant about social justice and downright scared of the term "evangelical." A select few find a balance where service and progressive ideals become the evangelism: instead of using the tongue alone, the whole person becomes an example of what God can do. That's what I'm looking for in a church.

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posted by Peter @ 17:23 0 Comments

8.20.2009

Mickey Chuckles

[Confused? Read this first.]

On Sunday we decided not to visit anywhere special but went to University Baptist, in part because a minister who was there during our student days was back as a guest preacher. We remember him offering the kind of energy and welcome that we're looking for.

He did not disappoint. On my way inside, his wife remembered my name - amazing because I didn't remember hers - and they chatted with me for a moment. Amanda and I felt that his sermon was more relevant than what we've been used to, or maybe it was just that his expressive tone kept us from zoning out (much). A bonus surprise was a duet our guest sang with the music minister.

Centered on the parable of the mustard seed, the sermon pondered the idea of deliberately sitting back to let God cultivate the church, and whether that will result in something like what happens when we leave a garden to God's cultivation: a mixture of wheat and weeds, fruity vines and bushy chaos. (For non-Bible scholars, he explained that mustard was essentially a kudzu-like weed in Jesus' time.) He put this in the context of growing the church: Should churches focus on the traditional three B's (building, budget, and bodies)? Or should churches grow each person spiritually, and focus on being the church in the community, without worrying so much about size, money, and outward appearances? Should churches be cleanly cultivated so they look impressive, or should they be diverse enough to include both people who the world views as wheat and those viewed as weeds?

We're not sure if he was describing where he sees UBC heading, or challenging the church to head in that direction. But I wanted to go to the church that gracefully welcomes weeds and wheat and deliberately grows everyone spiritually instead of just growing the three B's.

And I guess that's one reason we're not sure about our future at UBC: Amanda and I aren't entirely sure we're growing there. I wonder, though, if we'd grow more if we spent more time trying. In the summer, we've basically only been present for Sunday worship, and only two or three times a month.

So it was a better-than-average day at our moderate-but-traditional church. But we're not sure if this was because we had higher expectations, because it was something different, or what.

This is not to say we don't like the regular pastor. He's a nice man, he's caring, and I believe he has a genuine concern for social justice. But he doesn't seem to connect with the congregation in a challenging way like the pastor at our church in Greensboro did. Plus, there's definitely something to be said for having a different voice from the pulpit every once in a while.

We are off the hook for deciding where to go the next two weeks because we'll be out of town. And one of those weeks will be in Greensboro, so we will see if things at that church are as rosy as we make them out to be now that we're gone.

Also: Amanda and I have decided we should get paid by churches to evaluate them. Maybe we should take a commission out of the offering plates.

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posted by Peter @ 18:43 2 Comments

8.17.2009

Visit: Large Conservative Church

Last week, Amanda and I visited First Baptist Church on Park Street. I wrote a lot more about the fact that Charlottesville has two churches called First Baptist, and the parking lot and stuff, but it somehow got lost in the sinews of the Interwebs. I will, however, try to recreate what I said about the screens.

First Baptist is a large, fairly conservative church. They are in the Southern Baptist Convention and appear to be proud of it. Friends, I am not a big fan of the Southern Baptist Convention. I think some of what it has done in the last decade or two has led conservative Christians down a dark path. Since going to college, one of my main prerequisites for a church was that it not be in the Southern Baptist Convention. This is probably a big reason I ended up at a militantly liberal church in Chapel Hill - I admired that it had been kicked out of the Southern Baptist Convention. Point is, I am not a big fan of the Southern Baptist Convention. But since First Baptist is a big, fairly well-respected Baptist church on a nice street in town, Amanda and I figured we'd give it a try.

The sanctuary has lots of screens. There's a huge projector screen on the front wall, along with smaller but still massive flat-screen TVs mounted in various locations so everyone can see. The huge screen is blocking the baptismal pool and two stained-glass windows, so - GET THIS - some wise Baptist took a photograph of the wall when the screen was not there, and when the screen is not showing words, IT SHOWS A PICTURE OF WHAT'S BEHIND IT! I thought this was phenomenal. Oddly, the TVs also showed this picture, although they were not blocking miniature baptismal pools and stained-glass windows.

The service began with a video about debt, which sort of played like a commercial for the church's financial management ministry. Not worshipful, but probably useful for some. After we got into a more worshipful state through a litany, hymns, and prayer, the pastor initiated the Greeting, during which everyone was asked to tear off a piece of the bulletin to place in the offering plate recording their attendance, and then to greet others. For years, I have felt that these greeting times are nice but break the worshipful mood, but this one was over the top. The ritualistic ripping of paper distracted from the mood if it didn't kill it, and then we nervously said hello to the people near us, who of course had no idea if we were visitors or members, because it is such a large church. Then we sat down. But it continued. Apparently each person was supposed to say hello to all of the 900 other people there, or at least it felt like there was time to do so.

The music was interesting: There was probably an average or above-average quantity of songs, but they were grouped into only a few bunches. So it was two hymns, then some other stuff, then two boppin' praise-&-worship songs, then the sermon, then two more hymns. There was a full orchestra to help out the organist (who was one of Amanda's music teachers in elementary school). The music dragged on a bit: the hymns, though I liked them OK, were a little slow, and the boppin' songs were mind-numbingly repetitive, as boppin' songs tend to be. (I had not heard them before, and by the time they were finished, I was content not to hear them again.) And oddly, the congregation didn't seem to be singing much. But they did applaud a little after the boppin', after a "Praise the Lord!" urging from the Worship Pastor. Oh, and the offertory was sung while standing, using words on the screens, which was different, but it was helpful to be standing already when I had to walk down the pew to pass the plate.

There were a lot of kids, which is usually a good sign of a family-friendly place. I bet they have a lovely playground. Only a handful of itty bitties came forward for the children's message, though. Maybe it's limited to preschoolers so as not to overwhelm the speaker with squirmers.

During the pastoral prayer, some folks came up front and kneeled, and there were a few upraised hands during songs, so some of the congregants embrace a more participatory worship style. The pastor seems to be a nice old man (with a booming voice - a bit like a televangelist), but it's hard to tell much else from one sermon. He had props: plaid shorts and a shirt that, apparently, he wears during his downtime at home. There wasn't a scripture reading before the sermon; it was integrated into his 35-minute message. I was impressed that he hardly looked at his notes the whole time. I got tired of his yelling style of speaking and didn't get the main idea of the sermon other than to take joy in God - a nice reminder, but not helpful in evaluating the church's position on much of anything. He did say that, 9 out of 10 times, the answer to anything is in the Bible, and I got the impression that First Baptist is a little more literal on the Scriptures than I believe is appropriate.

I just want to say that 35 minutes is too long for a sermon. I learned in engineering school that most people have an attention span of up to 25 minutes, but even that has to be broken up somewhat. The service at First Baptist began at 10:45, which we figured was so they'd get out before the Presbyterians down the street and snag the best tables at Applebee's. But no. They begin at 10:45 so they can have an extra 15 minutes and still end a little past noon.

Sorry for all the complaining, but one of my pet peeves is when a pastor cuts off the invitational hymn after a verse or two because nobody has come forward. The bulletin indicated we'd be singing two hymns during "A Time to Decide," and after he cut us off during the first one, he made a comment about not wanting to draw it out and force anyone to make a decision. I respect that. And although I was ready for the service to be over, it seems like cheating to cut out music like that. It's as if he wanted a few more minutes of yell-preaching and made an on-the-fly executive decision to remove some music. What if I had been looking forward to singing "Satisfied with Jesus"?

One final personal complaint: First Baptist uses altogether too much Comic Sans. Not in the bulletin (thankfully), but on the screens and the web site. I know I sound like a diva, but come on, it's Comic Sans.

The pastor's name is Lindsay. The back of the bulletin has an invitation for guests to "meet Lindsay in the parlor to receive your gift for visiting us today." Small problem: Guests do not know where the parlor is. This is, as I have said, a large church. There are multiple buildings. I wasn't sure I needed my gift, but Amanda is a sucker for a freebie, and I was somewhat interested, so we looked around for a while before giving up. We did get a nice e-mail from one of the pastors with info about a home group Bible study for young adults and a college-age Sunday School class. And we're on their e-mail/mailing list for a six-month free trial period. (Thanks, torn-off part of bulletin!)

The church's vision is "Love God, Love Others, Serve Both," which is included on a lot of its materials. I like this vision; it's well-focused and valuable for keeping such a large congregation centered. In principle, it has its priorities straight, and I think First Baptist is making a positive contribution to Charlottesville. But overall, Amanda and I agreed that it's not the place we were looking for.

If I thought I had a substantial number of people reading all the way to the end of this, I'd ask for a vote of which church we should visit next. Maybe next time.

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posted by Peter @ 17:07 3 Comments

Escaping Greensboro

[I made the following post a while ago on the facebook. I am now copying it here for continuity's sake, with some edits to avoid full names.]

Sunday, November 30, 2008 at 9:51pm

It seems more difficult than it should be for Amanda and me to "escape" from Greensboro and North Carolina in general. We keep getting pesky reminders that it still exists, that there's still a church there with a lot of people that we miss.

 For example, we just received our first checkbook from the UVA Community Credit Union. The checks have lovely photos of Charlottesville landmarks... and they came to us straight from the manufacturing/distribution facility in Greensboro. Then there's furniture. Now that we're not planning to move in the next couple years, we're ready to move beyond the futon and the plastic nightstand. But the furniture store taunts us with "Carolina Prices." And we bought something, I don't remember what, that had a label from Boone, of all places. Boone! And just today, in church, they announced a quick overnight mission trip to lovely Charlotte for the purpose of packing shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child.

The freakiest thing is that our church has some missionaries visiting next Wednesday for a world-missions focus. Cooperative Baptist Fellowship missionaries. Missionaries to Hungary. Missionaries who we don't really know but who were celebrities from our church in Greensboro. I am hoping that they'll bring some people we do know "on tour" with them as roadies.

Isn't it enough that I have to pretend MSU is giving the sermon, instead of our dear TEL, in order to pay attention? Isn't it enough that I wish BTM would play "Jesus Loves Me" on the organ before and after the children's sermon? Or that I want the ushers to stop passing the offering plate across the whole row? Or that I really wish we could have the closing hymn without a spoken invitation every time?

Sheesh. I want to copy and paste my past into my present.

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posted by Peter @ 07:09 0 Comments

8.15.2009

More on Churches (not Moron Churches)

Looking back on the few entries I have made here, they mostly address church and work. Those are two big parts of my life, and this post begins another mini-series about churches.

I'm a little sad that I didn't blog much about church when Amanda and I lived in Greensboro, because now we really miss the church we had there.

It's not like everything there was perfect. In fact, when I rediscovered this blog site of mine, I had an unfinished entry (it was barely started, actually - just a title) about how I was not in support of that church leveling a historic house for a few more parking spaces. But it was a place where both Amanda and I felt welcomed and included, and where we grew in our faith. So we miss being there.

Kinda like we missed our old church in Charlottesville after we moved to Chapel Hill. And now we've been back in Charlottesville for 10 months, attending University Baptist Church, the church we used to miss, where we were married. So all is right with the world, yes?

Except we've changed... We began our married life in Chapel Hill, moved to Carrboro, then moved to Greensboro. We church-hopped in Chapel Hill, settled on a militantly liberal church that didn't ever feel quite right, then moved to Greensboro and visited only two churches before finding one that was basically perfect. We changed through our life experiences.

...And our church in Charlottesville hasn't. That's one of the comforting things about it: each Sunday, the order of worship is strikingly the same, the offertory is done the same way, Communion never varies. This consistent nature is one thing I love about how the music is done there: for each hymn, the organist plays a full verse as an introduction, the congregation stands on the last stanza of the introduction, the first and last verses are in unison, and any middle verses are in parts. Once you learn the routine, it makes it easy to worship without worrying about doing something wrong. It is still a moderate church with a traditional style.

But maybe a church needs to change a little.

I'm not sure what change is needed. Maybe the leadership retreat (termed an "advance") will figure that out, and I look forward to hearing its findings. But it just doesn't feel quite right anymore.

As a result, at the risk of offending people there, which I really do not want to do, Amanda and are checking out some other churches in our city. When I started at UVA, I did that. I visited the big church, the hokey church, the black church, and others before settling on UBC. Having grown up nearby, Amanda has pretty much only been to her home church and this one.

Visiting elsewhere might simply end up making us feel sure that we should stay at UBC. Perhaps seeing other places will help us appreciate the qualities that made it ideal for my college years. Or perhaps we'll find someplace else that feels right. If that happens, it will be sad to leave, but a church should help with spiritual growth, and if that's not happening, it's not the right place.

Timing is also important. It would be even more troublesome to be church-shopping if we already had kids who were "established" at a church. So it looks like we've got until February to figure something out!

But still, we're somewhat invested at UBC. I sing in the choir and got nominated to serve on the Transportation committee.

In the end, we enjoy tossing the blame for this experience on the pastor at our church in Greensboro. He helped us see how a church could welcome us and help us grow spiritually and, as a result, raised the bar a bit for future - and past - religious experiences.

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posted by Peter @ 07:22 0 Comments

Hello, blog!

I kind of lost track of this blog for, you know, a couple years. But I recently had need of writing, so I found it and will try to put my thoughts here a little more frequently than before. Maybe I'll go back and make some edits, too. Just in case I become famous.

For now, think on this, something I wrote here in May 2006 and just rediscovered:
"I mean, I tend to lean a little more towards the liberal side than Amanda does, so I can't see myself being happy in a very conservative/ evangelical/ fundamentalist church, but I don't want to force her to attend a church where she doesn't feel at home. Neither do I want for us to end up attending separate churches."

More to come...

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posted by Peter @ 07:14 0 Comments

11.16.2006

a king and a kingdom

"my first allegiance
is not to the flag,
a country,
or a man.

my first allegiance
is not to democracy
or blood.
it's to a king and a kingdom."
-derek webb, who is giving away his most recent album for free.

It's nice to hear some songs that have quotable, relevant lyrics, but this album has so many of them that it starts to stress me out - I can't type them all in, and even if I did, it doesn't read the same as it sounds. So just go download it for yourself. I think Derek Webb would be a good person to have coffee with, if I were the type to have coffee with people over intelligent conversation.

I don't want to get into the "What would Derek Webb do" thing, but I do kinda wonder how the lyrics would go to a song about the recent events of the North Carolina Baptist State Convention. Enacting "one of the most rigid anti-gay policies among the nation's Christian churches," complete with the threat of deploying investigative teams to determine whether churches are affirming or approving of homosexuals, really seems wrong to me.

There's something about trying to stay in our comfortable little bubbles and minister only to those like us that makes me sad. Isn't there something wrong with telling local churches that they cannot choose how best to carry out the task of ministry? Local church autonomy is one of the historic Baptist principles that I find very important. Yes, it also applies to associations of Baptists, so the NC Baptists are free to make their own choices, and this decision was made by a democratic vote. But there's so much politics and so little spirituality. Others have said it more eloquently, but I'll add my voice to the refrain.

Two problems stand out: (1) the simple point of not being willing to minister to those who are different, and (2) the absurdity of pursuing this issue when so many others should take precedence. College Park Baptist disagrees with NC Baptists on the former, and First Baptist Greensboro disagrees on the latter, yet enough people didn't disagree with either that the resolution passed. And how many of those who voted for exclusion had really thought about it and discussed it? How many were like the Christian in another Derek Webb song:
"Don't teach me about
politics and government.
Just tell me who to vote for.
...
Don't teach me how
to live like a free man.
Just give me a new law.
...
Don't teach me about
moderation or liberty.
I prefer a shot of grape juice.

Don't teach me about
loving my enemies.

Don't teach me how
to listen to the Spirit.
Just give me a new law..."

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posted by Peter @ 21:49 0 Comments

11.05.2006

Buses and bikes

Ah, the joys of a chilly Sunday afternoon in fall 2006: watching a car race while blogging. It's the perfect way to make sure you don't miss something exciting without feeling like you've spent the whole afternoon losing brain cells. Today: two of my favorite things, buses and bikes.

Item 1: Buses.
Following up on my last post, which was admittedly a long time ago, we at the Greensboro Urban Area MPO have been working hard to think of how to get folks involved in stuff they generally wouldn't care about otherwise. My favorite possibility: using a bus as a mobile meeting room! At first, it might sound farfetched to some, but they do it in Fayetteville and my co-workers are actually considering it seriously. We were thinking about having a meeting at the mall to grab some extra attention, and we might still do that, but the mall might charge money. With a mobile meeting room, you can set up in most any parking lot or on most any street corner. Or we could drive all around the city honking the horn and getting people to come outside and see what's up. I mean, what could be more convenient? Instead of trying to get folks to come to an open house, we bring the open house to them! -- dang it, I was so excited about the possibility of driving a bus that I missed Jeff Burton crashing into the wall after blowing a tire. -- Anyway, I'm hoping this will work out and that I'll get to drive our mobile meeting bus.

More bus excitement:
I had a meeting on Thursday at Greensboro Transit Authority and got to go on a tour of the admin building and bus lot afterwards. It just so happened that they received a brand-new low-floor Gillig the day before, and we got to go check it out. I think it's GTA's first low-floor bus, and I think it's their first Gillig since the mid-'90s, when they were buying Phantoms.

I sat in the driver's seat and wished.

It had the same steering wheel and driver's seat as the Gilligs at UTS, and the four-way flasher had the big plastic red switch extension that our new Gilligs had. The transmission pad was different, and a lot of the controls were arranged differently. The destination sign control was above the driver's window instead of above the windshield, probably because the low-floor design makes the windshield really big. Anyway, that was exciting.

Item 2: Bikes.
Sometime I should probably write more about College Park, the church we attend now. A few weeks ago, we went out to dinner with the pastor and his wife, and in my babbling, I mentioned something about getting a bike rack at the church. Expecting the typical response of, "Oh, that's interesting, but we probably want to put our resources elsewhere," I was surprised to hear him say that he'd like to have one installed. I followed up this week with the possibility of a custom-designed functional art piece, which might cost a little more than a standard bike rack but could add a little something special to the church grounds, even for people who drive everywhere. He asked me to look into that a little more, so I'm checking with a local artist who specializes in "functional sculpture." So that's pretty exciting. We'll see if anything comes of it.

In other news, I'm going to an organ concert tonight, which should be cool. I've got a meeting/mini-conference in Raleigh on Thursday, and I signed up for a Habitat build next Saturday. I'm still trying to get rid of these hockey tickets I have for next Saturday's Hurricanes vs. Penguins game in the evening... if I have no luck by then, we might go to the game, but I really think I'd rather have pizza night here. Does that make me old and boring?

I'm missing C'ville but enjoying Greensboro too.

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posted by Peter @ 16:31 0 Comments

6.14.2006

church rant (postscript)

Interestingly, the Sunday after I wrote the Liberal Churches Rant (below), we happened to run into Binkley's pastor at lunch after church. Feeling a little guilty about being a hateful blog-ranter, I got nervous when he came over to our table to chat, but as always, he was warm, welcoming, and friendly. Try not to be too critical, Peter! We mentioned our plans to move to Greensboro, among other things; after a while, he left and went to his table, and I calmed down a little.

When we left, though, we stopped by his table to chat some more. It was then that he asked us to be worship leaders. One of the Binkley mantras is "every member a minister," and we're not even members, but we still got invited to lead a responsive reading, read scripture, and do prayers. So this past Sunday, Amanda and I were Binkley worship leaders for the first and last time.

After the service, we went to the Fellowship Hall to shake hands with everyone, as we had been asked to do. Coincidentally, it was the pastor's 10-year anniversary celebration, so the receiving line went a little slower than usual. OK, a lot slower - we stood there for 45 minutes shaking hands, making nervous small talk, and staring blankly at people as they waited to speak to other, more interesting/important people down the line. (This was also a scary thing for us because we usually skip the receiving line after worship.)

On the whole, people were very nice and welcoming, and many of them asked us our names and if we had just joined the church. It got to be kind of fun to tell them that no, we'd been there for two years and were about to leave, and wasn't it a shame that they hadn't gotten to know us yet.* One woman asked if we were in high school. Another was completely sure that we had a young child. The craziest thing was that I met an alumnus of my planning program -- he's a big shot transportation planner for Arlington, but he was down in Chapel Hill visiting. So I did get some networking out of the event.

We're looking forward to moving to Greensboro, but it will be sad to leave Carrboro. If you love lifting boxes, come help us move!


*I don't think we ever actually said that last bit.

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posted by Peter @ 22:41 0 Comments

5.27.2006

Liberal Churches Rant

For most of the time we've been in Chapel Hill and Carrboro, Amanda and I have been attending Binkley (officially The Olin T. Binkley Memorial Baptist Church). To put it mildly, it is progressive (a Duke Divinity student called it "the crazy liberal Baptist church"). Binkley has been quite a change from the more moderate congregations we've experienced in the past. It was created in the Civil Rights era as a place where blacks and whites could worship God together, overcoming the bitter division of other Southern congregations, and since that time it has made a point of being at the forefront of equality and social justice. A huge portion of its budget is split up among dozens of humanitarian organizations. All text and hymns are gender-neutral and politically correct. And as a "welcoming and affirming" church, it aims to be inclusive of all, regardless of race or sexual orientation. One of the precious darlings in the preschool Sunday School (er, Church School) class that Amanda taught has two mommies.

So is it really welcoming? Sure, as long as you're a well-educated liberal Democrat.

That's what has bothered me most about being at Binkley. Two years ago, after leaving University Baptist in Charlottesville (where I am proud to remain a member), I was ready to find a church in Chapel Hill that had absolutely no ties to the demonic Southern Baptist Convention but that also didn't rely on PowerPoint and a praise band for worship. Binkley does fit those requirements - it was sort of kicked out of the SBC in the early 1990s - but Amanda and I don't fit its requirements quite as well. The church doesn't have any official statement that all members must be registered Democrats, but it might as well. The ministerial staff members are great, and I don't think I've ever heard a sermon that explicitly endorsed a political candidate, but discussions in Church School classes and elsewhere make it quite clear what type of person is not welcome at Binkley. If you aren't well-versed in philosophy, history, and theology, you won't understand a lot of what goes on in Church School. If you aren't a liberal Democrat, you'll find it uncomfortable to laugh at jokes about conservatives and middling moderates.

It reminds me of being back at UVA, where you couldn't have a discussion with another student without the conversation turning to which adult alcoholic beverages were the best. For those of us who chose not to drink, it was a bit lonely. I think that's how Amanda has felt sometimes at Binkley. I guess you could also say that we've felt overlooked - we have been there for nearly two years, and we've been involved in handbells and teaching the kids this year, but still, people walk past us in the hallways and refuse to say hello, give a friendly nod, or make eye contact. Perhaps they are focused on the day's social justice task, or perhaps a young white heterosexual couple is simply of no use to them. Some parents of the kids in Amanda's class don't know her name. This is by no means representative of everyone; there are some awesome people at Binkley who we've gotten to know fairly well, most everyone is friendly once you know them, and as I said before, the ministers are great. But it isn't welcoming. Sometimes, it seems more like a social justice army than a faith community.

We're moving to Greensboro in less than a month, and it will be time to find a new church. Many of the more friendly Binkley folks have noted that we might not find a church like Binkley in Greensboro (I have avoided the temptation to say, "Yes, thank God.") and have asked if we'll commute to Chapel Hill on Sundays. Not so much. I mean, I tend to lean a little more towards the liberal side than Amanda does, so I can't see myself being happy in a very conservative/ evangelical/ fundamentalist church, but I don't want to force her to attend a church where she doesn't feel at home. Neither do I want for us to end up attending separate churches.

The solution: in Greensboro, we must find a moderate church that really does welcome people like us. I heard an NPR podcast recently with an interview of the retiring Cardinal Theodore McCarrick in D.C. who had been a staunch advocate for a moderate position for the Catholic church. When I heard it, I realized that, despite my general sympathy for liberal views and my problems with fundamentalist positions, I identify most with the middle. That's okay with me, and I need to find a church where that's okay too. I close with a quote from that interview (please excuse me if the Latin is incorrect).


"There's a great line from the old fathers of the Church: 'In medios dat viritus - In the middle is virtue.'
And some people are going to say, you know, that's mediocrity; it's not. It's real courage to be able to stay in the middle and resist the extremes."
- Cardinal Theodore McCarrick

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posted by Peter @ 15:52 0 Comments